Sewing and sowing

Today I stitched three of the triangles which will eventually adorn Macca Pacca's quilt cover. They have been waiting a long time as I need to spread the fabric on the floor to fold and pin them before machining them and getting up from the floor takes a lot of energy which is something of a minus quantity in the winter. Now that spring seems to have arrived it is a lot easier.

I went to Hatton Locks for lunch and sat in the sunshine reading my book and watching the world go by. I needed my fleece but it was not too cold to be pleasant. When I got back home I planted a wigwam of french beans and a couple of rows of carrots. The beans are new and I shall plant some more next week but the carrot seed was left over from last year so I'm not sure if they will come up. The garlic is doing very well and it looks like most of the cloves I planted have come up so we should be self-sufficient in garlic from July.

Garlic looking good

Keeping health in mind - depression

This was the title of the talk at this morning's Lent Breakfast. Last week Nick and I went to Rushden on a family history hunt so I missed that one but this week we looked at mental health and spiritual growth. It's not easy to analyse your feelings about your own depression at 9 o'clock on a Saturday but it was a very interesting talk about how the church as a whole, and individual members, can help people with mental health problems. The main way is to get along side rather than to confront - offer a cup of tea and listen rather than trying to 'fix' things by asking why are you crying/cross/anxious? Being told to 'pull yourself together' is definitely not helpful!

I have learn through years of coping with depression that there is rarely a 'quick fix'. I have methods of coping which work most of the time but seemingly minor things can push me back into the pit. Guilt is a major factor for many and the church has a role in helping people to cope with this, but it is a process, a journey, not a magic wand moment. How many of us take on jobs and roles in the church because we are afraid that if we don't volunteer the job won't be done? Christian stewardship is not just about using our gifts but using our gifts appropriately - ie not wearing ourselves out. And as part of our care for each other we need to have an eye to how much people are being asked to do - not so that we can take jobs off them, but by having a conversation they might say which jobs they would be prepared to give up.

One thing that the speaker, Clive Hogger, said which really struck me, was a quote from someone called Bill Hybels - "The local church is the hope of the nation". Do we agree with this and if so, is it a threat or an opportunity? So often we use our churches as a safe place to hide, but should we not be on the lampstand rather than under the basket?

In the Q&A session at the end we considered the idea that mental illness can be seen as not conforming to the norms of society, and so where does that leave those of us who try to conform to God's society? Mark (vicar at Berkswell) asked whether there was a difference between being in your right mind and being sane.

As you can see I brought home lots of questions which hopefully I will have time to consider but one last word from Clive. "In the 10 commandments we are told to have a day off a week. If you are not doing that, you are endangering your mental health as well as breaking the law of Moses"

Lent discipline.

This year's Lent Breakfast series in Balsall Common is on Wellbeing and so far we have heard from a respiratory consultant from the local hospital and a retired psychologist who is also a local preacher. In the Elmdon circuit some of the churches are having a sermon series based on the York course, "A Rich Inheritence" and at Dorridge we are following this up with bible study each Wednesday. This week I had Lent Breakfast last Saturday, sermon on the Holy Spirit on Sunday, housegroup on Tuesday (we are also studying A Rich Inheritence but without the sermon series) and then bible study at Dorridge on Wednesday.  I could also have taken part in Solihull Methodist's bible study as I usually go to Space there on a Thursday morning but Holly came home on Wednesday evening ready for going camping with Misbourne this weekend so I stayed at home with her and while she was home I took her with me to aquafit on Friday to take some pictures of me with my oxygen.



My oxygen sits in a plastic box to stop the case getting wet!



I cannot move too far but I can do all the exercises

 I am trying to cut down on cakes and snacks for Lent and eat more fruit instead - losing weight and exercising will hopefully stop my knees hurting. Aquafit is good because the water takes the strain off my knees.

It's a nice day!

I've realised it is a long time since I posted on here - I've been quite busy! The other weekend we had a weekend in Stratford for Network. Alison Judd talked to us about her time as a Mission Partner in Barbados and we thought about getting alongside women in mission. We had a great time but it was very tiring. Since then I have had a cold and chest infection which does not help my breathing.

Yesterday I went to Papworth for a check up and they seem pleased with the fact that I haven't deteriorated very much and said that my fitness seemed to be improving. The critical thing now for being on the transplant list is my quality of life and at the moment, allowing for winter blues, it is quite good. There are restrictions obviously, but there would be other restrictions if I had a transplant. My osteopath has said that the aquafit is making me more flexible in my chest and upper back area. The main problem at the moment is that I have put on a lot of weight over the winter which I now need to lose.

Today is what my daughter used to call 'a nice day' - cold but with blue sky and sunshine which definitely improves the feeling of well-being so hopefully we can put the winter blues back in their box. We were woken at 7 by a phone call from my niece in New Zealand wanting to sing Happy Birthday to her uncle Nick before she went to bed. My sinuses are feeling more comfortable so hopefully my cold is on the way out and normal service can be resumed. I'm not very good at what the doctors call 'pacing' myself - if I feel better, I do things and then don't feel so good, so today I think I will have a gentle day to save myself for District meeting on Thursday. One thing I need to do today is order my oxygen for a weekend at Swanwick before Easter.

I am reading through a wide selection of study books as part of creating a library for housegroups at church and trying to produce a booking out system. This seems a suitable occupation for a quiet day!

Suprise!!

On Wednesday I put the washing outside for the first time this year - I've never had a tumbledrier and during the winter, or in bad weather, washing is dried on a rack suspended on a pulley over the stairs. There is something about line-dried washing, especially sheets and duvet covers.

Today I decided to do a bit of gardening, clearing out the leaves and last years foliage from the front border. I enjoy gardening but find it hard work as bending down restricts my breathing but my knees do not appreciate kneeling or crouching. I tend to use the giraffe's technique, legs apart, to get close to the ground. The frost seems to have been strong enough this winter to make the acanthus die back to ground level, previously I have had to cut it back so that the new shoots can come through, so I was able to rake out the leaves etc fairly easily. While pulling up the dead montbresia leaves, I found lots of green shoots and a green frog! I left a patch of leaves in a corner for him but as we don't have any ponds nearby, I assume he is just passing through.

All things bright and beautiful

Last week I saw lambs tail catkins on the road to South Yardley; today I saw pussy willow glistening in the drizzle and the snowdrops by my front door are breaking out of bud. Yippee - spring has sprung!!! (My primroses were originally from my uncle's garden in Devon and flower from late November so they no longer count as indicators of spring)

Yesterday I made some barra brith for the Start! course on Wednesday. I had written on the recipe that it fitted a 2lb loaf tin but I think that was when I used the weights - this time I used my new cup measures which Heather gave me and it was a bit much. Perhaps next time I will use the 3/4 cup :0)



My cup measures



Barra brith - Speckled bread

I am currently reading Can these dry bones live? by Frances Young on the doctrine of the Atonement. It is one of those books I need to read with a notebook to hand in order to get my thoughts straight.

Out with the old, in with the new

So far this year has been marked by a cold which does not want to go away! Every time I think I am getting better, I do a little too much and back it comes. I did use the Magnet service at Acocks Green and it seemed to go down well. I used it again on 6th Jan (actual Epiphany) at Space in Solihull where Deb and I discussed ways of making sure that our services were as inclusive as possible.
Last Sunday was our Covenant Service at Dorridge and straight afterwards I drove Holly back to Cliff. There was a holdup on the A38 south of Burton (which I think in hindsight probably had something to do with the draw for the FA cup which Burton were part of) so we went for a mystery tour through Barton under Needwood amongst other places. Back on the A38 again we made good progress and stopped for lunch at our favourite Little Chef at Alfreton. I was very tired by the time we got to Cliff and really needed the mug of tea and sit down after we had transfered her belonging up to the second floor. I decided not to stop on the way back but trundled along with no problems, getting home by around 6.30.

This week has been the start of my 'new me' resolution.  I have put on about a stone since the last time I was at Papworth in the summer and I need to shift at least some of it before I go back in March. They also want me to improve my fitness. Last year I was attending Pulmonary Rehab twice a week which is an hour of gentle, self-paced exercise but in November I started going to aquafit once a week at my local leisure centre. I found that I enjoyed it (one of the things I have missed since being on oxygen is swimming) and, by using the longest tube I have for my portable, I can manage to work on the spot. I can pace myself and the water supports me. This year I am going to go twice a week, Tuesday and Friday, which means that it is worth me getting a daytime membership. That also means that when I feel up to it (or I want a change) I can use the exercise bike in the gym or go to spinning (indoor cycling) classes without paying extra.

This Sunday I am preaching at South Yardley about whether it is wise or foolish to follow someone as the first disciples followed Jesus. We will be looking at what we are prepared to give up or leave behind and what we will take up as we work to keep our covenant promise.

When the song of the angels is stilled, when the star in the sky is gone, when the kings and princes are home and the shepherds are back with their flocks, then the work of Christmas begins. To find the lost, to heal the broken, to feed the hungry, to release the prisoner, to rebuild the nations, to bring peace among the people and to make music in the heart.